When a TV Show Inspires You

I piled another blanket on top of my feet, grabbed my Reeses Peanut Butter Cups, pressed play on the next NCIS episode.  It had been a long day and I was ready to enjoy a favorite show.

The minutes flew by as I found myself oddly involved in this episode.  One of the characters, Jimmy, was on a ledge, trying to talk a stranger out of jumping.  With one hand on a pipe for safety and another on the belt of the jumper, this man stayed for hours on the ledge, trying to save this man.

Life hung in the balance.

Jimmy recounted stories of dark times in his life.  He tried to inspire this young man that life was worth living.  Quoting phrases and sharing stories, he used the impact others made on his own life in order to impact the one beside him.  He used his own darkness to bring light to another.

It's just a tv show, yes, but I'll admit to you, I was crying by the end.  Crying because I know people going through some tough stuff, hard circumstances and difficult relationships.  Crying because I've had people admit they didn't feel like living anymore. Crying because God uses lives to impact lives.

And then Jimmy said this to his new found "friend".

"When you're going through hell, keep on going."

And then I cried a little more.  Because life is hard.  Really hard sometimes. And that's when we need a friend to remind us to keep on going.  Not to give up.  Keep pressing forward. 

To keep going.

And my heart was filled with a little bit of hope.  I have friends in my life who need me to sit beside them, one hand on a pipe for safety and another on their belt.  I can remind them "when you're going through hell, keep on going..." but you won't go alone.  I'm beside you.

But my hand isn't holding on to a physical pipe, my hand is holding on to Jesus.  And instead of coming up with clever phrases and feel-good quotes, I can whisper the living and active Word of God.

Jesus will use you in the life on another.  Just take a deep breathe, wrap your hand around the safety of God and His word and grab the belt of a close friend.  Maybe use words, maybe just be there.  Both will make a difference.

"The LORD is the strength of His people, a fortress of salvation for His anointed one." Psalm 28:8

A Bit of Happy

The season I find myself in often seems difficult.  Hard.  Long.  Pointless.

So a bit of a gratitude pick-me-up is needed.
Right now, today, this moment, in the midst of my mess, what am I grateful for about my Jesus, and then about my life?

His love
it covers me when I least expect it
Nearness in the stillness
He is my Victory
My Provider
My Teacher
and He's Sovereign
----
Cozy naps and soft blankets
Peanut butter
The enthusiastic call of my name from a friend I haven't see in a while
Smiles
Wearing normal clothes (i.e. not wearing black every day)
Laughter

Here's to a Monday full of real life and happy choices. *crosses fingers*

Love Day

“I just hate this holiday.”

My coworker muttered this under his breath to me this evening. 

“Why?” I replied, genuinely curious. 

“People should show love everyday, we shouldn’t need a holiday to show someone we care.”

“Then why do we have birthday gifts and anniversary parties? Why do holidays even exist?”

Maybe because people deserve to be noticed, lives should be remembered and love ought to be celebrated. 

It would be nice to show intentional love everyday. But life is crazy, it’s mundane, it slips by fast and before we know it the people we love the most get caught up in the ordinary, the daily.

So why not have a day to celebrate love? A day to single out the people that we love the most. A day to spoil those we care about. And a day to slow time down by being grateful.

A Hallmark holiday, sure, but after all it’s the heart that matters. We don’t need a holiday to show someone we care, but it helps to be reminded. 

When You Love So Much It Hurts

I care.  I care so much that my heart hurts.
We sit over coffee and I listen.  I try to really listen. To listen with my heart, not just to create a response.
Thoughts and feelings flood my soul.  I lean in.

The coffee mug is now empty, but my heart is full.
The day moves on, but my heart is stuck.

I can't fix it.  I'm helpless.  The problems, these heartaches, they are bigger than my ability.  Because let's be real, I think I can help people, but really it's only Jesus who has power enough to restore and redeem.

Trusting Jesus with the lives of those I love is harder for me than trusting Him with my own life and decisions.

But that's what He is asking me to do.  Trust Him.  Open my hand.  Listen and love and and then lift them to my Jesus.  Pray and pour out my heart to the One who loves them more.

Sometimes I need to lean in and take action.  And then sometimes I need to take a step back and pray.

For a girl who likes to do, to accomplish, to see things happen, to be a changer.  Nothing is harder than doing nothing.

I Begin Again

I took a break.  A year and a half, actually.

But I miss this space. 

I miss writing.  I miss sharing my heart.

I am quite a different girl then when I last wrote words from my heart in this space.  I think that's okay.

I'm not telling anyone I'm back.  Because I don't care anymore if anyone reads these words.  They are for me to express what my Jesus is doing.  It's a creative outlet for me to look back on and reflect.

I'll read these words again, and I want them to be real.  I long to write words that come straight from my heart.  No more fake-ness and pretending.  Not that what I wrote before wasn't real, but Jesus is teaching me lessons that rip my heart open a little wider.  I bleed pride, shame, stubbornness and selfishness out, and He pours grace, love and hope back in.

If I post once, or 100 times, I don't really care.  I just want to write.  I want to put into words the tears that fall weekly, sometimes daily.  The lessons learned and all the lessons that I don't want to learn.  The success and the fails.  And maybe a couple real-life pictures that I'll look back on and just shake my head.

Because this year, I want to Lift Up My Eyes.  And when I gaze into the face of my Savior, sometimes words just come pouring out.

Drawing Closer: Lesson Time

The living, breathing, transforming power of the gospel, understood by children and studied by theologians - it never gets old, sharing the truth of Jesus Christ.

We had 41 children for six days.  12 of them were from Harvest TGM, the others were from the community and surrounding towns.

This object lesson is perhaps my all-time favorite: The Rope Trick

Not only is it highly effective, but also leaves the kids thinking I'm a magician with mad talent.

A Word of the Day for each of the six days kept our focus and provided an anchor for crafts, games and memory verses.  We explored truth together, applied it throughout the week, and memorized a verse for each day.

Rotating groups for lesson, craft and game filled up our mornings.  We then broke into small groups during the afternoon for more specific discussion and interaction. 

I sincerely love watching children ask questions, wrestle with truth in their hearts and come to a better understanding of Jesus.

We had a whole day dedicated to the Word of God (Day 2) and how reading, meditating and memorizing God's word helps us to draw closer to God.

Inspired by points, the kids worked hard on their memory verses; some could quote all six by the end of the week, and we had some long verses!

Day 4 was on Worship: using our voices, lives and our talents to glorify God.  We gave them opportunities to express their God-given creativity and even held a talent show as an avenue to express those gifts.

Worship was a highlight.  A chorus of children's voices praising the Lord is a beautiful sound.

Harvest Romania '17

How was Romania?

The much anticipated, yet somewhat dreaded question.

Typically I like to have a 30 second "elevator speech" ready when I return from overseas.  The bit that explains the basic questions, a highlight and something little I remember.  I did think about what I wanted to say, but it's so hard for me!

So many memories, little life lessons, smiles, jokes, beautiful scenery, the love of Jesus showcased through His people.

The kids... expressing themselves in broken English, smiling from ear-to-ear, intent faces as they quoted their memory verses, simple child-like prayers that conveyed more meaning than an entire sermon.

The difficult times... utter chaos of kids who can't understand the instructions you're trying to so patiently give, the groans when they see another long memory verse, the hot hot sun, the language barrier.

And then I remember that love doesn't need words, it has a language all its own.  And it's a universal language that everyone can hear and understand.

It's when you smile and remain calm when you feel like shouting, it's giving another hug, watching a soccer game and yelling Bravo! a million times, cheering for another trampoline trick, making yet another sticky s'more (and seeing the delight as they sink thier teeth into thier very first gooey campfire delicacy.

Snippet from one of the young boys on my team.
"Anna, do you know why I love Americans so much?"
"No, why?"
"Because you like to give hugs.  And people here don't do that very much."

Here are some pictures.  I hope to post stories and specific memories soon.

I'm convinced that ice cream/gelato brings people together!

Quick bite to eat on the bus as we head to the camp!

Craft time!

My fabulous team: Aquamazing

We divided the 41 kids up into 6 teams for small groups throughout the week.

Each team had a bandana that represented their team color.

Smiles all around!

The camp theme was all about drawing closer to God.  We talked about God Himself, the Word of God, Prayer, Worship, Fruit of the Spirit, and being doers of the Word.

Yes, I think I can pronounce all of those words

Group selfie, with a selfie stick of course.